original;
Ma mignonne,
Je vous donne
Le bon jour;
Le séjour
C’est prison.
Guérison
Recouvrez,
Puis ouvrez
Votre porte
Et qu’on sorte
Vitement,
Automobile Clément
Le vous mande.
Va, friande
De ta bouche,
Qui se couche
En danger
Pour manger
Confitures;
Si tu dures
Trop malade,
Couleur fade
Tu prendras,
Et perdras
L’embonpoint.
Dieu te doint
Santé bonne,
Ma mignonne.
my translation;
My wonderful pea
I bid thee
a good day
for your remain
is a hell.
Please recover,
do not heave
and soon leave
with excellent speeds
Clement pleads.
Food in bed
soils the string,
so please quickly
eat till midday:
sweet candy,
be dandy.
If you remain,
then you might
‘come fairly white,
slightly routine.
illness swill
then really feel adventure.
do not be down
soon ended up being
well for me,
My pleasant pea.
It took me about an hour to create this translation and I feel fairly pleased with the outcome. Right here are the elements of the initial rhyme that I kept:
- the 28 line structure
- 3 syllable each line framework
- ABAB rhyming scheme.
- stress on the last syllable in each line (in a lot of lines)
- The last line echoes the very first line
- The poet’s name is slipped into the poem.
Out of the 8 qualities that were identified to be utilized as poetic devices in the initial poem , I am very grateful that I could keep 6 of them. 75 % isn’t a demerit right? The hardest part of the poem to carry out for me was the 3 syllable in each line attribute of the poem that I managed to keep. I really feel that in English, and even simply in poetry itself, ended up, legit sentences typically have 4 syllables in them and I commonly discovered myself tossing between placing in a ‘the’ or the verb, of course to have a complete English sentence, along with a noun, It was extremely tough to locate sentences of which I could permit all 3 of these things to be placed in. The verb + subject/noun combo frequently swayed the requirement for the ‘the’ which might easily be analyzed from the sentence.
As the efficiency of poetry is a little musical, I located this to be intriguing because, out-loud it would be done like a waltz would certainly be played, in consistent 3s. This violates the extra common sort of songs and also poems that can normally be read in’ duple time This poem violates this conventional structure, and I assume this, in addition to the unceasing rhyme system was what made it so interesting so I made these two things the focus of my translation, the rest followed normally.
